AF Day 6 – hmmm, what to eat next?
I’m wildly full and want a snack before I brush my teeth. I have been eating non-stop for 2 days, I think it’s to fill my time and replace the sugar addiction Karen shared with me. My days are wake up coffee, yoga, go teach, steep walk then a tag team of eating and working online. I’ve been allowing it since it’s not drinking and mostly healthy foods, mostly. Is there such a thing as too much peanut butter, asking for a friend? Well it’s ridiculous and I feel like a water balloon with a rubber band around the middle. Ready to burst in any moment.
Thankfully I know how to adjust to my new found over eating. I’ll fast till lunch then eat simple and easy the next few days to counterbalance my truffle shuffle. Not like when I would hang with Karen, nothing comparable. I may feel bloated today but after a good night with Karen the next day(s) were nightmares. What did I say, who did I say that too? I spent what and ate what? The shame and guilt. Oh crap I drove? Where is this bruise from? I’ll take that extra jiggle in my wiggle over Karen filled regrets any day but not every day. Now what to snack on next….Cheese!
Classes have been great lately and my private business began without trying. Once I meet with my coach and Mr Resort I’ll go public. I’ll have a clear idea how I want to put this out there. Currently other studios are charging $3 to $5 a class and $35 for a massage. My minimum is $8 group and $20 private, need to make sure to bring the feels and have some kind of tangible result. I have a few irons in the fire at the moment. Thinking a BroFitness, bootcamp and a yoga/breathwork and dive. I want to create a boot camp for a month once the number system stops and we can drive at least once a week again.
Overall I feel pretty good. My body is sore today since I picked up the walking and yoga practice. I will keep ramping it up so my body feels ready to make videos by the end of the month. My practice is strong and doing things and gaining more core strength weekly. The beach is amazing and I need to take advantage of the zero people and perfect background. I feel behind the eight-ball on not doing this soon, need to quit stalling.
I found a bullet journal that tracks food/mood and sleep patterns, going to start that tonight. You can see if anything you are tracking is causing bad sleep, bad moods like food, exercise, or meditation. Plus I love quantifiable information, with graphs and charts.
Today I had two separate friends talk about drinking with me when they know I am having a Dry July and the other knows it’s a year. Dry July friend sent that meme where they are playing flip cup in the mirror and the year is bringing a delicious red, my favorite Karen, in December. Last time I quit drinking I started oddly this time last year with an amazing champagne. I had been sober for 6 weeks till this blog. That was a long year.
Examples like this make me appreciate my new found inner circle. I expect this to keep happening since my sobriety is new and it’s ok my friends talk to me this way, they mean well. I hope in time it fades or I will need to stay on alert when we hang out. Now the beer pong no feels at all, the other option will be my ultimate Karen. The holidays with a tasty, expensive, smooth, red wine, I swear it’s turning me on and a huge trigger even now in this moment. Making July Dry public was one of the best things I have done for myself and I can’t believe I had so much resistance to it.
Making cheese nachos and then off to rest. Tomorrow will be a week AF, big breath out.