I have been thinking about what to do with this platform. I want it to be my outlet and educational for me to learn from and others. How do you quantify my life is better? How long is the test ran for? I have been sans alcohol before and I don’t remember it being a rip-roaring good time. Sigh almost every tragic time has involved alcohol one way or another I’m pretty sure. How to measure my success is what I have been toying with lately.
I have been more sans alcohol that not lately and trying other spirits, you know to blame cheap Karen dates not all alcohol is bad. Honestly, I do feel a hell of a lot better after only 2 glasses of decent wine or nicely made margaritas of quality, not over poured vacation drinks. On the rock, I feel the sense of over pouring is highly appreciated over a decent tasting cocktail. I remind my bartenders they are not doing me or my date any favors. Last week I asked for a virgin mojito and was returned with a blank stare from the barmaid. I smiled, repeated my order, and shook my head yes a few time, in turn, she replied “that’s stupid, it’s the same price”. I asked her to put my drink in the blender with extra mint, it was stupid delicious.
With the new awareness of drinking and not, trying to blame a certain kind of alcohol over another is wild and all the other time/brain space I waste thinking about drinking. So much of my time wasted when it could be just no. That is what I want from alcohol like it’s an afterthought, not the main stage like it grew to be. Recently I was trying to get a group of women together for a fancy tea and pool time, no takers. For the same price, we instead had brunch with free-flowing mimosas! Really. This is alcohol in my life and I’m ready to navigate to a new path.
I am in process of many changes and a little nervous about not feeling stable. I do know this path will heal me and help me gain the freedom, flexibility, and overall feeling good and help others in the process. So I’m going to keep leaning into my sobriety and find what resonates with me and leave the rest.